"Always Look on the Bright Si-ide of Life"

Englishman Michael Davies had some advice for US fans.

First, as the citizen of THE soccer (okay, "football") nation, he consoles us by saying, "This is heartbreaking stuff, though, World Cup Football. I know. I'm English."

Second, he provides some suggested fodder for our fans to sing at international matches:

TOP NINE SONGS (with two sent off) THAT THE U.S. FANS SHOULD SING TO REALLY PEE OFF THE OPPOSITION (AND THE ENTIRE WORLD)

(1) "Stand up for THE Superpower" -- to the tune of the international football megahit "Stand Up for the Champions" -- an American Neocon wet dream of a song.

(2) "Wir Fahren Nach Berlin ... again!" The American version of the classic German football song "We're driving to Berlin" with "again" tacked on the end to remind the world that we've been here before.

(3) "(Clap,Clap) (Clap, Clap, Clap) (Clap,Clap,Clap,Clap) -- George Bush!" Even if you didn't vote for him, the French will detest it.

(4) "America, %&$* Yeah!" from "Team America."

(5) Any Christian rock!

(6) "We'll Never Leave Iraq" -- to the tune of "You'll Never Walk Alone."

(7) Any German rap -- I watched some on German TV last night, it was awful ... No wonder they like Hasselhoff.

(8) The theme from the "Great Escape," whistled. The England fans showed surprising sensitivity by not singing that in Frankfurt. Why should the "ugly Americans" be so considerate?

(9) "You only sing when you're enjoying the benefits of a U.S.-style political democracy and a market-driven economy" to the tune of the English classic, "You only sing when you're winning."