Aggravation and REVulsion at the REVolting game

I can't think of a game much more aggravating that this one. The Revs play some of the ugliest soccer there is...but it's effective soccer. Particularly with Caig in the opposite goal.

Conceding the whole field to the Dynamo, the Revs were happy with occasional forays into our end. That's all they've needed in the past, and that was all they needed tonight. We have an aggregate of 0-5 goals versus the boring team from Foxboro, and we're even 0-3 with our A-team on the field. (Game recap; Chronicle recap. Kinnear: "Those guys were given an opportunity. If you ask for an opportunity and I give it to you, now it's your responsibility to take advantage." Ouch. But well said.)

Tonight we learned nothing. Here are some things that we already knew but which led to our defeat:
1. Possession does not lead to goals.
2. We have trouble scoring without DeRo or Ching.
3. We have trouble scoring because we have trouble getting a shot on goal.
4. We have difficulty breaking down bunkered in teams.
5. Caig is a shaky keeper that cannot keep us in games.
6. Stutter-step PKs are not smart. It didn't work for the best player in the world (that's Christiano Ronaldo) in the Champions League Final, how could it work for Stuart Holden. (And Holden took an absolute blistering shot vesus Reis in the MLS Cup Final of 2006; why change it up now?!)
7. Coach Steve Nicol hates soccer but loves his job. His antipathy and his security are both supported by his team's style of play.
8. John Harkes will throw an "as well" into the middle or at the end of any sentence, even if it doesn't make sense. That may not have been a factor leading towards our defeat, now that I think about it, but it did irritate me.

Even though we controlled possession, it wasn't due to solid passing play or creative dribbling. We didn't do ANY of that. It was just because the Revs were playing defensively. They don't care about the beautiful game -- never have. They care only for what matters: 3 points. Well they got it. And the Dynamo certainly didn't deserve 3 from tonight.

Us: 15 shots, 5 on goal (33%)
Them: 7 shots, 6 on goal (86%) and of course 2 IN goal.

Was there a bright spot? Sure. Her name is Marlen.

Marlen is a University of Houston student majoring in Hotel and Restaurant Management with a Minor in Dance -- the exact same academic combination as Warren Buffet's, I think. Her ideal evening would center on a five-course meal at an upscale restaurant. Don't expect her to paint the town red afterwards, though. No, sir! She'd much rather relax in front of a good movie. Perhaps something that provides great introspection on the human condition. Or something starring Clooney.


Okay, seriously. The bright spot(s) for me tonight was Mullan. And Ashe. Mullan was everywhere, and he was hungry. He had two rockets that forced Reis to make his patented Reis Uber-Save. He also nutmegged Reis with a ball that went just wide of the goal. I was surprised that Kinnear took Mullan out in the second half. Perhaps Mulls was spent. He was offside a lot in the second half.

Ashe was also threatening tonight, and had a few looks at goal himself. Sure he sometimes traps himself in the corner, but he was putting New England on its heels all night and was exciting to watch throughout.

Holden didn't have a bad game overall. He just didn't seem as smooth and decisive as he has in the past. He was doing the heavy lifting throughout the match, but he had some notable gaffes. He was frozen about midway through the first half when Ashe sent a ball through the box that Cameron merely nicked; and Holden looked positioned to do something with the ball but was taken aback by Cameron's (mis)strike. Yeah, Holden also had that poor penalty kick (go back to the decisive shot, Stuie), but I think that may have been the Lords of Soccer bringing justice for the poor call. I don't think a PK should have been awarded.

And then there's Caig. I say the Dynamo get a clean sheet if Onstad is back there. Onstad probably intercepts the pass before it gets to Ralston on the first goal. That goal wasn't really the fault of the keeper though; the left mid should have been back to cover Waibel's man when Waibel had to cover Ianni's. I can say with some assurance that Onstad stops the second goal. First of all, he wouldn't concede the corner kick in the first place off such a simple shot on goal. Second, I don't recall him ever chesting the ball into his own net. Granted, once again our defense bequethed time and space to an opponent -- our our own box, no less -- allowing an easy shot, but the shot went to the keeper. A professional keeper should get those.

A weekend off from the inconsistent Dynamo. Let's hope the USMNT takes care of business versus Barbados, ideally with some solid play from Ching. Let's also wish DeRo, Onstad, and the Canadian National Team the best of luck as they head to Kingstown.